Are anti-Bullying crusades killing Human courage?

Bucholz, C. (2012, June 26). 7 Time-Tested Ways to Deal With Bullies. Retrieved December 26, 2015, from http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-time-tested-ways-to-deal-with-bullies/

 

Chris Bucholz – a columnist and well known writer / analyst of comedy.  Began career in 1984 and been a member of the Cracked staff since 2005. – Credibility = Low

Purpose of site is to use satyr to address issues – Credibility = Low

This source is a .com (or commercial) site used to generate revenue – Credibility = Low

Academic value / referencing is almost non-existent – Credibility = Low

Article has had 708,207 views meaning a significant number of people have at least previewed this article – Credibility = Medium

As I began research on this topic I became really frustrated.  I grew up in an environment where “bullying” was a part of growing up.   I am not talking about criminal abuse, which I see as a totally different thing.  I am talking about name-calling, teasing, pinching, and just plain meanness and orneriness.  Kids (actually, people in general) are by nature mean to each other from time to time.  It is a coping mechanism we use sometimes as a survival tool.  Some say this behavior is learned but I am not nearly so sure.  I believe, as a species, we are born predators, fighters, survivors.  We are built this way for several reasons that are very vague but basically it goes back to the survival of the fittest mentality.  The strong will survive while the weak are vetted out.  The question I keep asking myself is when did name calling, teasing, pinching, etc… become a crime instead of a part of growing up? When did “toughening up” fall out of favor as an acceptable social norm (Cialdini and Trost, pg 152)

This article attempts to demonstrate, through humor, 7 strategies a victim could use to stop bullying. While some of them might seem outrageous each of them are, depending on the situation also quite practical.  One of the strategies suggests burning the bully.  Of course they do not mean this literally.  One strategy a victim might consider is to seek out a form of physical retaliation.  This strategy could have severe consequences though.  Another strategy suggests that the victim simply lead a good life.  Grow up, become successful, get the beautiful, handsome, sexy, rich… spouse, buy the nice home, get the yacht… just to spite the bullies of your youth.  The last strategy though is the best as it is based off of all the last strategy described plus totally using your power to take revenge on the former bully.

I chose this source because I really want to know what happened to the attitude and acceptable norms of learning how to deal with bullying.  Every source I came across that talked about toughening up, as a way to deal with bullying, made me feel like I was some kind of second or third rate citizen / parent for thinking that a child needs learn how to handle name calling, teasing, etc…  It was as if somehow or another we are supposed to change human nature and make bullying completely go away.  Lord, how I hope there is not a sane person out there who thinks that is EVER going to happen.  Bullying is a power play.  According to Keltner and associates, individuals and groups respond to bullying in a variety of ways.  Many studies indicate that one of the motivators behind bullying (and thus, an opposite motivator equal in resentment at being the victim) is the need for attention.  Bullies could be looking for potential rewards or at least an opportunity to serve their self-interest(s) (Keltner, pg 271) However, I believe that too little attention is spent on the other half of the bullying scenario – the victim.  What are they doing to stop the bullying?  According to Keltner and associates, the victim represents a person in a reduced power situation and takes on the inhibition-related characteristics in the relationship. As I read these articles and conducted my research it did not take me long to start making some connections.  It has not taken long, a couple of decades (maybe 40 years) of anti-corporal punishment laws, child-abuse laws, and similar ‘social improvement’ laws for us to turn from being the predator at the top of the food chain to a pack of neutered  Jackal wimps!  I mean, come on we just spent the last blog talking about name-calling rather than the real issues.  In one of the previous blog posts the refugee claimed they left their country because “they did not want to fight”.  Do you guys hear what I am hearing?  If a person is not willing to fight for their beliefs, to stand up for themselves (and I mean just be brave, show courage – not necessarily get in a butt – stomp), grow some thick skin: what are we supposed to do?  Where does it end?  Even the victim has resources the bully wants! All the victim needs to learn how to do is keep the bully from getting access or control over those resources. (Keltner, pg 265-266).

Part of me was relieved to find this rather satirical outlook on bullying.  I know bullying can be hurtful, painful, and depressing.  I know it can lead to tragic events that OF COURSE we are going to hear about because bad news and death SELLS.  But I also know it cannot be stopped.  All these articles about how “we” are not doing enough to control bullying sicken me.  What about responsibility for our own actions, good parenting, and oh, I don’t know…. a reality check!!!!  In all honesty though this article said one thing that stood out from the rest, it had one truth that I felt I could take away.  The solution to dealing with bullying and the inequality of power that exists between the bully and the victim is not to try to stop bullying from ever occurring.  The solution is for us as individuals, groups, and a society, to do our best to see the strengths of people, to create attitudes that are positive as possible, as often as possible so that when a person is faced with the power play known as bullying they have a foundation on which to draw from in order to survive.  Survive, not dominate!  Because bullying will happen!

 

 

 

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Beat My Child; Just Don’t Put Her in Prison – GET REAL!!!

This house would bring back corporal punishment. (2012, January 26). Retrieved December 29, 2015, from http://idebate.org/debatabase/debates/house-would-bring-back-corporal-punishment

In this link there are four different perspectives on the pros and cons of Corporal Punishment for adults, in particular criminal offenders.  The majority of the arguments are based on the question of whether the current criminal custodial sentences (incarceration) are effective.  If not then what options are we, as a society left with?  Answer: Corporal Punishment.  It was really interesting to see the results of the pre / post polls.  Before the arguments were presented only 25% of the pollsters were for Corporal Punishment of adult criminals rather than imprisonment, 25% were mildly against, and 33% were strongly against.  After the debate 50% of the pollsters were for and 50% were mildly against. NO ONE was in between or strongly against.  In the arguments for, criminologist Peter Moskos claims that, “… most of us, if given the choice, would opt to receive ten lashes rather than spend five years in prison.”  So, I asked my 15 year old daughter if she would rather get spanked or grounded.  She sort of laughed and said, “Duh, spanked!”  I do not know if I have ever even spanked her before so I do not know what she was basing her decision on but it did not take her long.  This source also presents the pros and cons of incarceration on the offenders’ families. Is it better to take away a family member thereby protecting the family from future criminal behaviors or is it better to use Corporal Punishment and allow the offender to quickly resume life, hopefully in a rehabilitated manner?  Is it better to ground the star athlete and keep them out of a game or two or is it better to have them clean the locker room after the game?

I love this website.  I found it through http://www.noodletools.com as directed by the Ballenger Journal activity.  The International debate education association or IDEA portal is a website that allows a person or group to search a debate topic database with pro/con arguments.  Most of the debates are based on information that comes from some, if not mostly, credible sources (very rarely is there a .com).  The purpose of the source is to provide the leading arguments for and against a social issue.  I chose it because of the situation I read about concerning the Washington teen in the KTLA 5 News post.  Should the father have recorded the incident, for any reason?  Would he, could he have modified her behavior with less extreme measures?  I am assuming from her name they were Middle Eastern, or Muslim.  In many Muslim cultures a woman’s hair is her treasure.  In most traditional cultures it is such a precious commodity that no man is allowed to see it except close family members and the husband. I am assuming this family was at least in some aspects conformed to tradition since it was the cutting of the hair the father uses as a powerful lesson.  If this was the case for Izabel then I am positive this was a horrific ordeal for the young lady.  Should Corporal Punishment resume the traditional norm in behavior modification it had throughout most of the 1900’s.  In their source on Social Influence Cialdini and Trost introduce us to the Societal-Value Perspective which tells us that a norm is neither good nor valuable in and of itself.  What is important is whether or not it is accepted. Perhaps, if the father had felt able to utilize corporal punishment he would not have resorted to the course of action he did.  Still, if as a society we cannot even bring ourselves to whip, lash, or otherwise punish a criminal offender, I do not think corporal punishment as a method of behavior modification will have a resurgence any time soon.

I always like seeing before and after pictures so I really like the before and after polls.  I also like how easy it is to cite these articles with the cite option at the bottom below the Bibliography. What I do not like about this source for academic research is the lack of knowledge I have about the author, the actual poll that was administered, or the timeliness.  As far as the material I actually read I did not find very much of it to be shocking or confusing.  However, I did find it interesting that so many of us, if came down to being punished ourselves would prefer Corporal Punishment, and all the humiliation it brings, to incarceration.  Why?  Is it because we believe we can recover from physical pain quicker than the mental / emotional damage incarceration might cause.   Is it because we are afraid of having a cell mate named “Bubba”?  If incarceration is so horrible, just the thought of it is so horrible, that I would rather get ten lashes (that would scar me for life) then why is it not effective in behavior modification?  Why do we, as a society have such a high repeat offender rate?  Finally, if I do something and am going to be punished for it I would rather get the lashes than be put in jail.  My husband loves me, and thinks I am sexy, even with my birthing scars.  However, would I want my daughter beat with 5-6 lashes for a DUI?  Not on your life!

Meaning Of The Names

“Migrants, Refugees and Asylum Seekers: What’s the Difference?” The Guardian. Ed. Alan Travis. 28 Aug. 2015. Web. 26 Dec. 2015. <http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/aug/28/migrants-refugees-and-asylum-seekers-whats-the-difference&gt;.
The article goes back to the true meaning behind the labels we place on these people. Maybe somehow, along the way, we have had lost the real context of the names and confused people with wrong meanings. For one,  a migrant is someone who moves from one place to another in order to live in another country for more than a year. It differs from a refugee who who has fled conflict and who is rin need of protection because it is too dangerous for them to return to their home countries. Asylum Seeker is a different story and one I had just heard of while researching this. Asylum Seekers are refugees just waiting to get their claims processed.
I chose this to educate myself a little more about the topic that was presented. What exactly were refugees and was the name a proper one given. All my life i feel as if i heard the name immigrant much more. My misunderstanding was not knowing their was a difference between the two. My research showed the process, the simple little facts to access the type of names we can give people. Its more informative than anything else but its a good basic base to understanding the names of people going through these moves. In the blog reading , Alexander Betts, director of the Refugee Studies Centre at Oxford University says
“Online searches for migrant are at their highest since Google started collating this information in 2004. And in the past month (to 25 August using the Nexis database), the most commonly used term in UK national newspapers (excluding the Times, the Sun and the Financial Times) was migrant – with 2,541 instances. This was twice as popular as the next most frequently used word, refugee.”
So, here I found I wasn’t the only one curious and with a not so busy google search engine.My research only jump started my curiosity and led me to even more articles of the name given to several types of people with several types of situations. I wasn’t alone and found comments section filled with just as curious readers who were broadening their minds just as I was. I learned that there is a giant difference between Migrant and Refugees and Asylum Seekers was another words added to my growing vocabulary. Asylum Seekers was a key interest of mine, because I had always heard the word refugee and migrant but Asylum Seekers was all new and just ready to be explored. Even if the name is quite different than Refugee, the two aren’t that much different and just a waiting response of approval can change that. Asylum Seekers, to me, seem to be the ones seeking for the title of refugee. Seeking a title that holds hope for them and their families.

How is this Migrant crisis different?

This migrant crisis is different from all others – BBC News. (n.d.). Retrieved December 28, 2015, from http://www.bbc.com/news/world-35091772

This article starts with a summary of the other migrant crisis that have occurred over the years. Explaining the significance of them and how they happened. For example, after the second world war many Germans were forced out of their homes. During the Vietnam war many of Vietnamese fled from the American bombings. Time and time again refugees were trying to find asylum in other countries, so the question the author raises is; why is this one different? He states the biggest difference is that European societies are changing very fast due to immigration, and it is causing an identity crisis.

I chose this source because I believe that the effect that immigration is having in Europe is a perfect example of inclusion and exclusion. These refugees are suffering from a form of exclusion. Feeling threatened in their countries they are seeking asylum in new countries. “As reflected by MacDonald and Leary (2005), among our less developed ancestors, both physical and social pain were functional in that they steered kin and other social groups from environmental and other threats, reorienting them in the direction of helpful others. As such, the social pain of exclusion was seen to have evolved as a means of responding to danger.” Quoted from Dan Allman’s The Sociology of Social Inclusion. Allowing these refugees to stay is a prime example of inclusion. A group of people working together for the greater good and advancement of our well-being. However, in doing so it seems that another form of exclusion has presented itself. Europe has never had large groups of migrants coming in from the outside before. This is presenting itself as an identity crisis in some parts of Europe, which is creating barriers between the refugees.

As I read this I was mostly intrigued on how having such a large group of immigrants might effect the one’s already living in that area. In a situation such as this most people are mainly focused on the immigrants lives and what they are experiencing. I thought it was interesting to explore the other side of the spectrum. A question that this raised with me is what negative effects are these refugees having on people, and what can be done to break down these barriers and bridge the gap for a more harmonious community?

Police Officer Charged with Murder

CNN WIRES. (NOVEMBER 24TH, 2015). “Chicago Police Officer Charged with Murder after shooting teenager 16 times”. Retrieved December 7th, 2015. http://fox2now.com/2015/11/24/chicago-police-officer-charged-with-murder-after-shooting-teenager-16-times/

What: This article shared a story about a police officer who was charged with first degree murder for shooting a teenager 16 times. This police officer killed the poor teenager for nothing. Although, the teenager had a 4 inch knife with him but he didn’t even show sign of violence. The video of this incident was released one year after this was happened. Jason Van Dyke (policeman) turned himself in to authorities. Police are entrusted to uphold the law, and provide safety to our residents. Well Van Dyke did the opposite. It was told that he was scared to death because he had a wife and two kids waiting for him at home so he didn’t want to die, therefore he shot the poor teenager 16 time.

Why: The reason why I chose this topic because it fits our discourse theme which is power and powerless. This article makes me sad because the policeman didn’t even gave the poor teenager a chance. He shot him 16 times even after he went to the ground. Some policemen think they have the power to everything and everyone. It doesn’t mean they are armed then they can do whatever to residents. This topic is really interesting to me because reading through this makes me changed my thoughts about good police officers. Well, not all police officers are bad but there are some that don’t even know how to control. I think people should stand up for this before it becomes a major problem in the nation.

How: Reading through this article makes me angry because these poor people just die from doing nothing. This teenage kid wasn’t even show sings of violence towards the policemen but one of the police office which is Jason Van Dyke, shot him 16 times. The power that they think they have in them should be treated with something that is safe. They should teach the police officers when to shoot and when not to shoot. This is not the first incident I’ve read about policemen shootings. There are a lot other shooting that have been all over social media. People should stand up for this and do something that is right to do.

“The Jungle” in France

WHO: Bajekal, Naina. “Migrants Wait With Hope, Resignation at Camp Called ‘the Jungle'” Time. Time, 1 Aug. 2015. Web. 06 Dec. 2015. <http://time.com/3981246/inside-calais-camps-jungle/&gt;.

WHAT: This article is about how thousands of migrants are flooding the French Port City of Calais in hopes to make it to England. The begining of this article is talking about a man who had left his family about a year a go to find his way to England. These migrants are drawn to England because they either speak the same language, have relatives and friends who have settled there or they believe the job market will be better than that in France. While other are loosing hope living waiting out in the “jungle” many end up applying for asylum in France and are giving themselves a time frame by which they will give up trying to reach England. Some have been waiting in the “jungle” a very long time while they are waiting for papers to be processed.

WHY AND HOW: I chose this article because if you continue to read to the end you will find a joy that will fill your heart as you read about the way these people are choosing to find the good in their very unfair situation. They are taking their professions and their education to help those in small hospitals tents, selling food and supplies to make a little extra profit and setting up schools to teach and play with the children. Though their circumstances have been tough and many have lost loved ones along the way, these people are fighters and I admire how strong they are and how determined they are to find a new way of life and a safe and better home for their families. The “Jungles” living conditions are not the best of the best. This Camp was set up without clearance and because of this France neglected to help for a long time. The regulations were to have 20 people to one toilet, whereas in the “Jungle” there is about 300 people to one toilet. But the people are starting to make things better and the living conditions are increasing. I think the migrants get blamed a lot for the war that is taking place in their country, when they are just a victim  of war. They are trying their best to get as far away from the war as possible. Trying to survive, and trying to do all they can to take care of their families and themselves. I can only imagine being in their shoes, I would hope that the people around me would do all they could to gather together and help one another in times of need, as well as play Michael Jackson music for everyone to dance to.

The Great Rise of Deaths by Shootings in America Today

 

WHAT: This article is talking about the amount of shootings that have taken place in the past year. Just in 2014 there was about 336 mass shootings that were recorded, but as of today the number of mass shootings in America has surpassed 2014’s record. Today there are fewer days between shootings, there was a shooting in California and then a few days later one in Colorado Springs at a Planned parenthood clinic. The Article talks about how the public opinion about gun control has shifted over the past year about controlling gun ownership and not about the right of Americans to own guns.

WHY: I chose this source because I was shocked to see how many shootings have actually taken place in the past year and even in 2014. It blows my mind that there have been at least one shooting a day in the past year. I have not been one who has grown up around guns so for me to fight for something I don’t have is kind of hard to wrap my mind around. But the more I read and the more I am watching what is going on in our world, the more I am wanting to implement my Second Amendment right into action. “The right of the people to keep and bear arms.” I have read many different positions on this very subject and it blows my mind to see what people have to say, as well as our current President who is wanting to put restrictions on our Second Amendment and take control of what form of arms you can bear and how you can do so. I do agree that being licensed to bear arms should be in place, as someone who has only shot a handful of guns in my life I would hope to be taught a few things prior to walking in a store and buying a gun. But also doing some other research I have come to find that guns are actually not the leading cause of death in our country as crazy as that is to believe with the current article I just posted…and the answer is not vehicle accidents either. The DEA have stated that drug overdoses are the leading cause of deaths in America.

Other source:“DEA: Drug Overdoses Are Leading Cause of US Injury Deaths.” VOA. VOA News, 5 Nov. 2015. Web. 06 Dec. 2015. <http://www.voanews.com/content/dea-drug-overdoses-are-leading-cause-of-us-injury-deaths/3038150.html&gt;.

If that is so, why is there so much attention on gun control? Is it because it is connected to the military? or because it is more public and messy? Why, if drugs are the leading cause of death in America are we legalizing maharajah and turning our eyes from those who are living on our streets and those who are selling in our neighborhoods?  But then they want to take our right to bear arms away from us? How are we to protect ourselves when the military is not near us? These are the things that flood my mind of the inconsistencies that are all over the media and being talked about all over the news.